Having healthy social connections and a willingness to take risks with others are critical parts of building emotional security. We need to feel embraced by the people around us so we feel supported. We also need a sense of autonomy to feel strong and capable. From the time we are born, we need help from other people to have our core needs met. We need parents and family to support and believe in us. We need teachers to help us learn and explore.
I believe we all share a biological need to have the connection of family, partners, friends and mentors to help make sense of the world around us. In the past two decades, the field of Interpersonal Neuroscience has provided a wealth of scientific evidence to back this up. We are at our best as human beings when we are part of something bigger than ourselves. We feel most supported when we have others to help us manage, and when we feel we have something to offer them in return. We shine brightest when we shine together.
At times we lose sight of our need for other people, or we stop seeing ourselves as valuable to others. That is where effective therapy becomes important. My goal with clients is to help them see their own struggles as leading to opportunities for improved social connection and rewarding growth — to help them approach conflict in ways that bring them closer to the people they love and need. Together we work to build tools and approaches that widen their support systems, open up new life perspectives, and facilitate a spirit of growth, curiosity, exploration and creativity.
Relationships are always a two-way street. Give and take is a fundamental feature of all relationships, especially in therapy. While I may have professional and theoretical ideas and life experiences that are valuable, you are the expert on your own life experiences and core needs. Exploring the intersection between those ideas, experiences and needs is where the real therapeutic relationship takes root.
If you would like to set up an appointment with Jim or another counselor, you can call our Intake Number, 512-366-0954. To contact Jim directly, call 512-967-3669, or send Jim an email.